Three Things To Agree On Before Saying “I Do” - Titi Ogunleye

Three Things To Agree On Before Saying “I Do” - Titi Ogunleye

There is a place of agreement before marriage; Gary Chapman said, “If you can’t agree before marriage, what makes you think you can in marriage?” Marriage is complicated, and when we allow certain things slide while dating; these things become issues later in marriage.

Some of the prayers that we pray in marriage would be unnecessary if we reach an agreement on these issues before marriage. The things we bring to marriages are varied; thoughts we have not given voice to, ideas on what marriage should look like, and opinions on how certain things should be done.

Regardless of how long you’ve been engaged or how much in love you are with your significant other; here are a few essential things to agree on before marriage.

Money

One of the biggest causes of divorce and conflicts in marriage is money-related problems. People have different attitudes towards money – talking about money before marriage should include full disclosure of financial status, decisions on how money will be managed in the household, who does what, and what to do if the financial situation of either party changes. It is important to have financial goals you’re working towards together.

Religion

I’m operating under the assumption that as a Christian, you are also in a relationship with another Christian. However are you in sync with your partner on doctrinal issues? Do you understand what he/she considers as faith in God? How does he/she see the place of God in marriage? How spiritually mature is your partner?

Raising Children

Most of the time when we think about marriage (before getting married), we think more in terms of romance and our love for each other; but I’m here to inform you that you will be parents together, and parenting requires different skill sets. You need to discuss your views on discipline, on corporal punishment, how to deal with expectations regarding the child, or even if one of you believes in a woman staying at home with the kids. All of these must be discussed.

May we not end up with conflicts in marriage in Jesus name. Before you commit to marriage, pay attention to your partner’s behaviour and what the say, ask them direct and open-ended questions.
Marriage is potent and it can permanently alter the course of one’s life. Do not ignore differences, talk about them, and reach an agreement.

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